The Smart Granddaughter

I was eating lunch on the 20th of February with my 10-year-old granddaughter and I asked her, “What day is tomorrow?” She said “It’s President’s Day!” She is a smart kid. I asked “What does President’s Day mean?” I was waiting for something about Washington or Lincoln … etc. She replied, “President’s Day is when […]

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IT PAYS TO KNOW GERMAN

An Amish Farmer walking through his field notices a man drinking from his pond with his hand. The Amish Farmer shouts: “Trinken Sie das Wasser nicht. Die Kuhe und die Schweine haben in ihm geschissen!” Which means: “Don’t drink the water, the cows and the pigs have shit in it!” The man shouts back: “I’m […]

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THE PERFECT HUSBAND

Several men are in the locker room of a golf club. A cellular phone on a bench rings and a man engages the hands-free speaker function and begins to talk. Everyone else in the room stops to listen. MAN: “Hello.” WOMAN: “Hi Honey, it’s me. Are you at the club?” MAN: “Yes.” WOMAN: “I’m at […]

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