Dems Drop Out Of Race Since The World Is Ending From Climate Change

U.S.—The recent U.N. conference on climate change and especially the words of 16-year-old activist Greta Thunberg have had a profound impact on the Democratic presidential candidates, so much so that they are now turning words into action and dropping out of the presidential race since they now think there’s no point to it. “We’re all […]

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It Snowed, So I Made A Snowman

8:10 – A Feminist passed by and asked my why I didn’t not make a snow woman 8:15 – So, I made a snow woman, too. 8:17 – My feminist neighbor complained about the snow woman’s voluptuous chest saying it objectified snow women everywhere. 8:20 – The gay couple living nearby threw a hissy fit […]

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Motorcyclist Who Identifies As Bicyclist Sets Cycling World Record

NEW YORK, NY—In an inspiring story from the world of professional cycling, a motorcyclist who identifies as a bicyclist has crushed all the regular bicyclists, setting an unbelievable world record. In a local qualifying race for the World Road Cycling League, the motorcyclist crushed the previous 100-mile record of 3 hours, 13 minutes with his amazing […]

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CDC: People With Dirt On Clintons Have 843% Greater Risk Of Suicide

(SATIRE)  According to a report from the Centers for Disease Control released on Thursday, people with inside, compromising knowledge of Bill and Hillary Clinton’s financial and political dealings are 843% more likely to commit suicide. “We’ve never seen a single risk factor cause a spike of this magnitude,” a CDC spokesperson told reporters. “Interestingly, in […]

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